Kanye West and All Things Grammy

Another Grammy Awards show has come and gone. I just tortured everyone on fb with my status updates on all things Grammy but I just wouldn't be able to remember it all for this blog. I don't have much more to say, but please, allow me to expand on those updates. Before anyone gets on me for what might be considered incoherent writing, I'll give a few disclaimers: 1) It's midnight 2) I'm expanding on fb statuses. Since when do those have to be coherent? 3) Most of the show's dialogue was incoherent so I figure I'd just continue the trend.

Grammy update thus far: Lady Gaga and Elton-YES! (tops Prince and Beyonce from a few years ago) Pink KILLED IT! Maybe I'm a sucker for bright lights, crazy outfits, and robot looking things but I liked both Beyonce and The Black Eyed Peas. Beyonce should have left Alanis alone though. I'm about ten minutes behind in the show...I'll be back :-)

Yes, Lady Gaga did her thing. I must admit, I didn't always get her. Actually, I still don't. But once I got past her always trying to shock people, I realized that she's actually really talented. Good call performing with Elton John- I mean really, whoever came up with that combo is a genius. Pink- AMAZING. I don't think she gets enough respect. Beyonce, I still want you to put some clothes on but I understand. You're afraid that if you leave anything to the imagination they won't want to buy you. Yes, I said "you" and not "your music." Oh yeah, I saw you almost fall down the stairs. Way to hold it together! Alanis, what are you thinking right now? Wouldn't it have been amazing if Beyonce had brought you out on stage?

Doug E Fresh and Slash made sitting through Jamie Foxx's performacnce worth it. Not sure that I'd like to sit in a venue where they're playing, but the Zac Brown band is pretty amazing! I can't stand Taylor Swift so I don't really care about what's about to come out of her mouth. Well, really I can't stand her acceptance speeches...maybe I'll give the performance a chance.

Jamie Foxx...thanks for making your old song new with two amazing musicians! Zac Brown Band, I might make you a Pandora station but that's about as close as I'm going to come to hearing you live. I'm not sure your fans will want to party with me :-/ We'll get to Tay Tay later. For now I'll just say that Stevie Nicks, minus her outfit, was great.

3D t.v. when you don't have 3D glassses is not okay. please tell me there's a second MJ performance!

There was no second MJ tribute. The artists in the first one were great but who could concentrate on anything but the 3D? Apparently I'm not the only one who didn't know Target was giving out 3D glasses for free. #grammyfail

oh snap 3T made it to the Grammy's!

Yes, Michael Jackson's nephews Taj, Taryll, and Tito Joe were on the Grammys. I suppose they were there to protect Paris and Prince, but really I think they just wanted people to know that they were still alive. 3T, you once asked " Why does Monday come before Tuesday ? Why do summers start in June ? Why do winters come too soon ?" I don't know the answers to those questions but I ask you, "Why won't you give up on your singing careers?"

grammy update: a) i promise i'm trying to keep these to a minimum, but i can't help it! b) i heart jennifer nettles from sugarland. c) mos def needs to lose the facial hair. he can't be my boo with all of that. d) cant handle rihanna's voice or really most anything about her. but i'm glad she made it to the grammys this year. #poortaste?

i just don't like rihanna. the end.

Dear Mary J. Blige, Please release an album called "Duets with Mary J." I love listening to you sing just about anything. But I really, really, love when you sing duets. For example, "What Child Is This" w/Andrea Bocelli, "Bridge Over Troubled Water" w/Andrea Bocelli, & "One" with U2. I think you're on to something.

Mary J. has come a loooooong way. She was great way back when, but she's stellar now. Release a duets album Mary. Trust me!!!! Anyone who doesn't like you now will love you then. Well, make sure you pick the right people to sing with. In other words, don't sing with 3T as my friend Sabrina suggested. That will just be a mess and a career killer :-)

Can't handle Roberta Flack's "neck brace"

Roberta, I know you're getting up there, but you can make better decisions than that. What would Donny say?!

Dear Lil Wayne, Eminem, and Drake, if the censors have to bleep out this much of your performance, maybe you shouldn't be doing it on t.v. Also, please tell your boy Quentin Tarantino that polka dots don't work on him, and tell Taylor Swift to sit down since she prbably doesn't understand what the heck you're saying anyway!

Do better men. Taylor, sit down!

Dear Kanye, Taylor Swift was doing alright on her own, but you did AMAZING things for her career!

Kanye West, you singlehandedly won Taylor Swift the Album of the Year. I could use this moment to explain all the ways you made this happen, but it would lead me down a path of more social commentary than I care to make right now. Maybe another day...maybe the next time a crazy Black man interrupts a helpless blonde haired all American girl's acceptance speech on live t.v. Awwww shux...I did it anyway. Whatever. I'm not denying that Taylor is talented. But I am suggesting that maybe she shouldn't have won over others in her category. Stop. Before anyone suggests anything crazy, I don't think Beyonce should have won. Just putting that out there.

Well, that's all I've got. My favorite parts of the night were not the performances or the awards themselves. It wasn't even Ricky Martin (yes this is sarcasm, although I did stand in line for hours during my senior year of HS to see Ricky at Tower Records). Truthfully, I just enjoyed seeing the musicians in the audience who if given the chance, I would go see in concert right now even though I am deliriously tired. Who are these people that I would allow to deprive me from my slumber? Obviously Carlos Santana and India.Arie! Oooohhhh...they should release a duet album! Man, I love music when it's good!

They Call Me Mr. Tibbs...or something like that!

Yesterday I was reading a news blurb about an incident that happened at my high school. I won’t mention what the blurb was all about because as much as I hype up and LOVE the “school with the tall white tower,” I dare not air its dirty laundry or make anyone think less of it. Pause. I can hear the gripes and groaning of alumni particularly of the “colorful” persuasion from all parts of the country, so allow me to address this issue before I get to the point. As much as people may want to hate on their time at P-P-P-O-L, you’ve got to admit that it did prepare you for a whole bunch of things: a) You were ready for college. Whether it was one of the old colonial colleges, a major research institution, or a very competitive liberal arts school that enrolled more people from New York and New England than you really cared to be in school with, you were ready for college. b) If you hadn’t learned how to deal with ignorance before, for many (mostly the guys I suppose), those walks from the 95th street train station were a great classroom. c) That Sweet 16 or Bar Mitzvah invite that got lost in the mail taught you that “you’re a really good friend, but…” d) You learned how to drive. Not from driver’s ed, but from watching WHAT NOT TO DO from the bus drivers on the 6:00. Isn’t it weird how different they drove on the 4:00 vs. the 6:00? ( Shout out to the Flatbush/Dyker Heights route drivers- Miguel, Leroy, Marty!) I digress. Back to the point.

So after reading the news blurb I started thinking about my dear old school and that got me thinking about all of my former teachers who are now my facebook friends. I have a dilemma- I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO CALL THEM! There are a select few who I’ve always called only by their last names and that will never change- Khan will be always be Khan, Bishop will be Bishop, and to them I will probably always be Stretch. But I didn’t have that last name-nickname relationship with everyone and I find myself uncomfortably stuck between my adolescence of yesteryear and newfound adulthood (I guess it’s not so newfound anymore). I want to be bold and call them by their first names, but I just know better. Just because I’m an adult now doesn’t mean I was always an adult, right? I don’t call my aunts and uncles by their first names, so why would I do it to my teachers? But, it feels weird for me to write “Hey Ms. InsertName! Love the profile pic!” on their fb walls. I guess until they ask me to do differently, I’ll defer to my good senses and upbringing and use their last names. I mean really, if I saw them on the street I wouldn’t dare call them by their first name so why do it online? Besides, I would hate for one of them to respond by saying, “They call me, Mr. Tibbs!” I know that has nothing to do with education, but it’s such a good line that I had to use it. I suppose I should use the more appropriate Sidney Poitier quote instead- I wouldn’t dare call my teachers by their first names because I would hate for them to say, “You will call me Sir or Mr. Thackeray.”

I was raised right so I guess I should act like it.